If you can’t pick a pizza, how will you be able to make decisions about sex?
Kind of a weird question, but my mom is kind of weird. She also makes good points. So, I have to share this nugget with you.
Before I start the story, I have to warn you, my mother LOVES to use random example s to explain life and give advice, and this time is no different. So, here it goes.
One day we were standing in the grocery store and I was in charge of picking out a frozen pizza for an easy dinner. I stood in the pizza isle just staring for way too long because for some ridiculous reason I could not make up my mind.
Finally, my mom walks up to me, stares me down and says “If you can’t pick a pizza, how will you be able to make decisions about sex, drugs, or life for that matter?”
Really? Did she seriously just connect pepperoni and black olives to sex? Yep.
And do I really want to talk about sex in the middle of the frozen isle? Nope.
The connection seems ridiculous but it’s actually a really good point. Stay with me. Trust me, no story is ever quick with my mother.
I suffer from severe indecisiveness. It’s a problem. I would rather let someone else decide things for me, or better yet, just never have to make decisions. But there are some decisions in life that you have to make and they will NOT always be easy.
There are times when you have to be in control and be confident enough to make good choices for yourself even when they are difficult decisions.
Saying yes or no to something like sex is a serious decision. You need to choose what is right for your body, for the person you are with, and most importantly yourself.
Handling peer pressure is a choice. Letting someone else makes decisions about your body, about drugs, about drinking, or anything else is never the right thing to do.
Something like choosing a college is another difficult but important decision. With a ton of possibilities out there, you need to be able to consider options, but ultimately listen to yourself and make a choice.
Picking out a frozen pizza? Not such a serious decision. But if you can’t be confident in the small things like pizza toppings, you will be completely lost when it comes to things that really matter or affect you.
Guess what guys! I picked out a pizza all by myself! Sometimes I amaze myself.
So make those small decisions now!
You will learn to trust your voice and be confident when it comes to decisions that are more important… like sex, drugs, and frozen pizza.
On a side note, she kept singing “Let’s Talk About Sex” the whole time we finished shopping.
Check the song out here: http://youtu.be/ydrtF45-y-g
- ttfn G -
I’m pretty sure I’m going to fail Geometry. We haven’t been in school that long and I already suck at it. What the hell am I going to do, I’m freaking out?
– Triangle Fail
Dear Triangle Fail,
This semester just started so you have time to figure it out so stop panicking. It may take some time and hard work.
Go talk to your teacher to see if she or he can help.
If you know someone who is great at this, ask him or her to help you.
Hire a tutor. Talk to your school counselor; most schools have lists of tutors.
Buy the Geometry for dummies book.
Look it up. There are so many tutorials online. You can find exactly what you’re having troubles with. There are so many YouTube videos just waiting to help you. Try Geometry made easy. Keep trying until you find ones you like.
You can try one or all of these suggestions. You will get it. Good luck! I believe in you!
Do you put up walls, or wear a mask to hide the real you?
Have you pretended to be something someone else wants to make life “easier,” or to be liked?
Do you ever feel like it is easier to be fake than to be you?
Are you being real?
I have to be honest with you, I act my way through too much of my life. I don’t even try, but like a safety vest, my mask inflates and I’m reacting appropriately before I can make a genuine mistake. It’s sometimes easier to unconsciously fake my way through moments than it is to remove the safety of being what everyone needs. It takes a conscious effort to remember to leave the safety vest off and actually be real. But once it’s off, the magic happens and it’s completely worth it.
It’s time to be real! Remove the safety vest and be authentically yourself. I challenge myself to be real.
I challenge you to be real.
Let’s do this.
That comment section below is getting pretty lonely.
- ttfn G -
I’m so embarrassed!!!!! I was at the store buying shampoo with mom and I turned around and saw my crush. I died a little inside how could I be there with my mom. I never thought I would get over that until he said oh the dandruff shampoo is down there. WHAT?? I said no (hehe OMG) Im looking for one that smells good. He said oh sorry I just thought because you had those flakes on your shoulder. Then I just turned red and ran out of the isle. I have seen flakes before but did know other people could see them. I’ve been just ignoring them. I don’t even want to talk to my mom about this I was so embarrassed. Help me or I will never be able to date again.
I understand dandruff can embarrassing, but it’s not the end of the world. Lots of people deal with dandruff so you are not alone. Think about this: why did he even know where that shampoo was? Hmm just a thought.
There are several kinds of shampoo and they are all about the same, but they work differently for different people. Pick one and use it daily until you see improvement then go down to 2 -3 times a week. If you do not see any improvement after a good try at home you may need to see your doctor to get a prescription shampoo that will be stronger.
In the meantime while there are still some flakes falling:
Wear light colored clothes because the flakes stand out more on dark colors. Also, wear your hair up in a ponytail if you can. The less your hair shakes around the less flakes will fall.
Dandruff treatment can be very effective once you find the one that works best for you. Don’t give up and definitely don’t stop dating because of it. Live your life and have fun.
Send us an update; we would love to hear how things worked out.
Today I equip you with the negativity shield.
It is an amazing shield ready to protect you from all things negative. It’s quite large as it covers the entire front of your body. It’s made of steel with a thin layer of rubber in the front. Let me explain how it works. It protects you from rude people.
Yes! The rude people protection you ‘ve been waiting for is here.
When someone rude throws negativity your way, the shield stops it.
The big “NO” on the front lets them know YOU DO NOT accept rudeness. That in itself is awesome, but wait there’s more. As the negativity hits the shield, it reverses the negative comment and turns it into a positive which hits the rubber and bounces right back at them.
Take that Mr. Rude Pants!
Ok, so we’re not going to wear a big shield around all day, but I still equip you with the power of the shield. When someone says something negative, it’s usually because they are unhappy. If they can make you miserable then they will feel better for that minute. Yes, only for a minute. It never lasts, so they are on to the next victim.
What usually happens when negativity comes our way? We let it in. We let it soak into our skin and we wear it around until we question if it is true.
Mr. Rude pants will still try throwing insults at you, but now you will have your shield ready. Don’t let the negativity in. Their words do not define you.
Also, take advantage of the rubber on your shield. You know they are only doing it because they are unhappy so throw a positive word right back at them. It will probably shock them and make them annoyed, but maybe they will soak it in and start believing it.
Let the good stuff in and shield the bad.
- NBL V -
I know who you will be with for the rest of your life.
I’m going to let you in on who it is in just a sec. First, I need you to answer a few questions. The answer to these questions will tell you the “who” you are going to be with forever.
Don’t start sweating. This is not a test. The questions are easy… well for now they are.
1. Who do you spend all of your time with? I’m talking about that one person you can never get away from.
2. Who needs to be at their best to physically and emotionally to support you?
3. Who knows all your secrets and deepest thoughts?
How did you answer? Did you say your best friend or maybe your girlfriend or boyfriend? Did you figure out who it is yet?
Here it is, the big reveal!
The answer to all three questions is YOU.
YOU will be with you for the rest of your life.
Think about that for a minute. It’s important to understand that. Think about how you treat yourself.
Time for some more questions. The first few were easy, so let’s get onto the tough ones.
You can start sweating now.
1. Do you treat yourself the way you would treat your best friend?
2. Do you disrespect or talk down to yourself?
3. Do you go after your dreams?
This time I cannot give you the answers. Only you have the answers to these questions. If you answered no to any of these questions then here comes the hardest question of all.
I’m not trying to get all deep in this post, so here’s the point: YOU matter and YOU are important. A great way to start loving yourself is to treat yourself like you would treat your best friend. If you wouldn’t talk down to or make fun of your friend, don’t talk down to yourself. If you would encourage a friend to go after their dreams, encourage yourself. If you believe in your friend, believe in yourself. Make YOU your best friend.
Respect, love, and treat yourself well.
If you don’t like you right now, learn to like you, learn to love you. Think of it this way: you are stuck with yourself so you might as well be with someone you like.
The bonus of loving yourself: no matter what happens in your life, no matter who comes in or walks out of your life, YOU will always be there. You can always have your back.
Give yourself a hug and get to know yourself.
- NBL V -
Whether you are just starting high school, already coming down with senioritis, or headed to college, this is a time full of new adventures and possibilities.
This is your moment to figure out what makes you passionate and then go for it!
It could be figuring out which sport you want to play, choosing a college major, or answering that dreaded question: what are you going to do with your life. This is your time to discover the things you want in life and find what makes your heart happy.
But what if you don’t know exactly what gives you those warm and fuzzy feelings?
Here are two tips that will help you figure out what you love and what makes you passionate.
Tip 1: Dream with absolutely no limitations.
Answer this question: If you could do literally anything, what would you do?
As a recent high school graduate, I have been relying on this tip A LOT. I was definitely not the person who had their whole life plan laid out. You know those people who have known what they want be since they were 5….yeah, no. Not me. So, I had to dream, not just little dreams, big dreams. Now when I say dream with no limitations, I seriously mean it. Dream with nothing holding you back! Dream like you’re a little kid again. Remember back when you were a crazy little kid and you truly believed you could be a ninja princess? A fairy doctor? President? Dream like that, dream while your awake, dream with the idea that anything is possible. Don’t be afraid of what comes out of your head and your heart. It will tell you a lot about who you are and what you actually want. You can figure out the details later. For now, just let your dreams guide you.
Tip 2: Try Out New Things
How do you know what you like unless you give it a try? This tip was super helpful for me. Like most of my friends, I had a basic idea of what interested me, but I wasn’t 100% sure about what I loved. So I tried different things that sounded interesting. I discovered some things that I really love (like writing and volunteering) but beyond that, I got some awesome experience. Not everything I tried turned out to be my passion, but I put myself out there, made new friends, and gained more confidence.
This is a great big world filled with endless possibilities. Don’t be limited by what other people deem acceptable. Don’t determine your passions by what you think is comfortable and safe. Just because you haven’t done something before doesn’t mean you aren’t capable of it.
These 2 tips are not about putting a label on your dreams or what you want to do in life. They are about realizing that the possibilities are infinite. You get to discover what makes you happy and run after it. Dream, try new things, discover, and have fun with it!
Be willing to dream like literally anything is possible and be willing to give your passions a try. When you do that, you can figure out what your heart truly wants.
- ttfn G -
Is it weird to not like parties and to not go to many parties when you’re 15? My friends all seem to be doing it and I feel like I should but the last one I went to I had a panic attack, I feel like I’m missing out
– Party Pooper
Dear Party Pooper,
No, it is not weird to not like parties; we are individuals for a reason. If you are not going because you don’t like them that that is perfectly fine. You might feel like you are missing something, but you can have fun doing other things with your friends. If you are not going because you are nervous and you have panic attacks then I think you need to address that.
Think about what makes you panic. What about the situation triggers the attack? Try to think through the situation before you are in it. Why are you anxious about going to the parties? What can you do to become less nervous? If you walk into a party and feel anxious, try going outside for a little while, walk around, and calm down before trying again. Try to have a plan before you go to the next party. A panic attack is just excess adrenaline that runs through your body so taking deep slow breaths can be a big help. You are not alone in this; many people have panic attacks. I have panic attacks when I have to do public speaking.
If these panic attacks become too much to handle you should go see a doctor.
Parties or not you deserve to have fun, so don’t let these panic attacks stop you from your life.
I Googled “meaning of the lotus flower” and I thought what popped up is pretty awesome, so I have to share it with you.
This is what I found:
The lotus flower has the ability to grow in muddy water and bloom without any mud on it. It literally rises above its murky environment and blooms into something beautiful, strong, and completely clean.
I also learned that water easily slides off its petals.
Everyone reading this (and the girl writing this) has been through some sort of “muddy water”. We all know what it is like to experience a bad environment or negativity.
Think about it. This flower is pretty much saying that even if you have been sitting in mud, even if you have been struggling with everything going on around you, you can still bloom beautiful and strong.
Did you just relate to a flower? Yes, yes you did.
It doesn’t give a crap about the muck surrounding it. The lotus flower lets the dirty water slide right off its petals. It has bigger plans. It doesn’t let the mud around it determine what its life looks like.
I want to be more like the lotus flower. I want to emerge from any situation as myself.
When you find yourself in a bad environment or surrounded by negativity, remember the lotus flower. Let all the nasty stuff slide right off.
You are strong.
You are beautiful.
You are amazing.
- ttfn G -