Dear Hope: Parents Won’t Listen to My Point of View

Dear Hope,

My parents are being dick holes.  How do I get them to understand my point of view? Apparently, I’m having problems with “respect” w/ teachers at school, but they wont listen to where im coming from, simply because my teacher is my teacher.

Dear Misunderstood,

Trying to get someone to understand your point of view can be very frustrating.  Your parents are probably frustrated too; they want you to understand them.  Everyone wants and deserves respect.

Most times parents just assume that the teacher is right, but if you are having problems with a teacher, you need to keep trying to get your parents to understand.

Ask your parents if you could set a time to have a serious conversation with them.  Tell them that you understand why they would believe the teacher, but that you also want them to understand where you are coming from.  Explain your side calmly; if you start to get mad just take a few deep breaths.  Let them know you need help with this, and you are coming to them because you respect them.  Do not yell or swear. Show them the respect that you want back.  If they won’t listen or they get mad, just say okay and let them be.   Give it a couple days and try again.  Don’t spend all your time in your room, be polite and smile when you see them, you are showing them your maturity.  They will see that you did not get mad, did not throw a fit.  The next time you approach them, explain that you want to handle this with maturity.  Tell them you are thankful they are listening to you and that you will listen to them also.  Ask them what they need from you.  If they are listening, ask them if you can come to a compromise, and come up with a solution that you can all agree on.

If nothing works, try talking to a counselor at school.  It’s possible they can set up a meeting for you and your parents to help you communicate better.

I understand you are upset and probably want to scream and give them a piece of your mind, but it won’t help.  Writing all your frustrations down can help you get them out.

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