Category Archives: Dear Hope

Dear Hope: Ask the Hope Girls: My Friends Think My Boyfriend is Ugly

Wow, we finally did it! We are still learning and adjusting some things, but we made the move. We are so happy and excited about all the support we have gotten so far. Thank you, everyone! We could not have done it without you all.

Here is our first “Dear Hope” question. As you can see it’s a little different. We will still be answering questions every Sunday, we just changed things a bit. Same people, same great advice, new look!

This will be the last full question on this site. You can always check us out at thehopegirls.com

MANDY ASKS, 

There’s this boy I have been hanging out with for a few weeks. My friends didn’t know because I was waiting until we were actually going out.

Well, they just found out and they said they understood why I didn’t tell them. It’s because he’s ugly and I was embarrassed. They said he’s nice but looks wise I could do much better.

I was really upset by what they said because I like him and I think he’s super cute.

Why would they say that?

My friends have always supported me so why are they acting this way now. What should I do? I’m mad at them.
– Mandy

Hey Mandy,

Wow! Of course you were upset. Your friends were being rude.

Our first reaction was to say ditch those friends. But we believe in second chances. They’re your good friends and they have always been supportive. They just had a moment of temporary mean girl syndrome. We’ve decided to give them another try and we think you should too.

We don’t know why they said what they said.
They could be secretly jealous.
They might feel left out or worried that you will spend too much time with him.
Or maybe they just don’t think he’s cute and were being rudely honest.

It actually doesn’t matter why. You have to let that go and stop thinking about it.

What happens next is up to you. If you like this guy, be confident about it. What you like is not what they like. Who cares! That does not and should not matter.

Our advice is to be yourself and date the person that is right for you.

You should also have a conversation with your friends. Make it clear that you are not okay with them talking like that. Whether they think he is cute or not doesn’t matter. He is your boyfriend, you like him, and you think he is super cute. End of story!

Let them know you have always appreciated their support and honesty, but back off when it comes to your boyfriend’s looks.

GOOD friends are definitely worth trying to keep. But, if they continue to be “mean girls” it might be time to move on. They never have to think your boyfriend is cute or even like him, but they do need to treat you with respect.

Gabriella Says: When I started dating a new guy a few years ago, my friend got super jealous. Instead of talking to me about it, she would say mean things about him and told me I was ruining our friendship. Our friendship had not changed, but she definitely did. I wanted (and tried) to work it out with her, but in the end, I realized it was better (even though it still hurt) to walk away.

Thanks for this question! It is always hard when you feel torn between your friends and a relationship. Good luck! We hope you can work things out with your friend!

Hope, happiness, and lots of love,
Gabriella & Veronica
The Hope Girls

Summer Couch Sitting

 

Its summer, schools out and all you want to do is sleep in, play video games and maybe go out to the movies or Taco Bell once in a while. Sounds fun! But you still need money to buy you a taco and movie tickets aint cheap. So unless you’ve got an endless supply from mommy and daddy ,you need money. I’m not talking loads of money. Just enough to get by. Yes, there will be plenty of kids working there tushies off all summer saving for a car or for college, but maybe that’s not you.
So what can you do to make some coin?

Here are five ways teens can be lazy this summer and still buy a taco:

1. Dig through your couches and find loose change.

Find change anywhere and take it to a change machine at your local grocery store and cash it in. Change adds up – I see a burrito with your name on it.

2. Talk to a neighbor about mowing their lawn.

They may want it mowed every week or every two weeks or even once a month. How long does it take to mow a yard and it doesn’t have to be done every day. It’s a great way to make some money, but only have to work a few hours a month. You can set up to do several lawns, the more you do the more dollars you make.

3. See if anyone wants their dog walked.

Walking a dog for 30-60 minutes a day. Yes it is daily, but only for an hour. Still less than a part time job and still gives you plenty of gaming time.

4. Find out if any neighborhood parents need a date night.

You could babysit once a week so they can have a night out. Or you can be a mother’s helper, offer to play with the kids once a week for an hour for a small fee so mom can have some me time.

5. Look for neighbors that could use some help with things like carrying in their groceries or getting their mail.

I had a lady that lived by me and she could not walk to far, so she was not able to get her own mail. She paid me to get her mail and bring it to her. It took five to ten minutes out of my day. You can take a bathroom break longer than that.
So for all those who are choosing a lazy summer have fun and enjoy your tacos.

– NBL V –

Dear Hope: I Have Different Interests

 Dear Hope,

I’m kinda lonely.  I have a great family and I have friends, but they don’t completely get me.  I like things they don’t so we can never really talk about the things I’m into.  I’m not trying to complain they try, and we talk about other things, but since we don’t have the same interests I don’t usually get opportunities to really talk about some of the things I’m into. 

–          Different interests

Dear Different Interests,

It’s good to know you have great family and friends who support you.  What you need now are people to talk to with similar interests.  Without knowing your interests I cannot suggest specific things to do, but I can give you some ideas.

–          Ask a counselor at school if there are any classes or clubs at school with your interests.

–          Look in your area for clubs or classes.  (Clubs can have a small fee or be free and classes can have scholarships if needed.)

–          Start a blog- write about the things you like and you can connect with people of similar likes.

–          Look for websites, forums, or chat rooms where you can have conversations about your topic.

Have fun and remember just because family and friends can’t completely talk about your interest they still like to hear about you.  When you find new people with similar interest don’t cut everyone else off.

Good Luck!